When I was 21, I moved out of my parents’ home. Technically, I moved countries. I had never really lived away from home and while I wasn’t a spoilt child by any means, I didn’t know how to cook {as I stubbornly refused to learn}, was not a fan of ironing clothes, didn’t do my own laundry, couldn’t drive and had only worked one summer in a library. I could clean my own room and that was about as far as my housekeeping skills went. Yet, I moved countries to pursue my dreams. My mum was a bit worried about my lack of skills in the culinary department in particular, but I assured her I wouldn’t die of starvation. I still knew how to cook eggs and toast.
Now, a decade later, moving out of home was the best decision ever. It’s not that my parents were bad to live with {except for their borderline-OCD need for cleanliness} and it was certainly easier to live at home. After all, it’s pretty cruisey to have all meals cooked, the laundry done, and no bills to pay.
However, here are some reasons why I think everyone should move out of home at least some time in their lives and not just when they are married. They are also the reasons why for me personally, it was the best decision I’ve ever made:
- You grow: Sure, you grow older. But you also grow wiser in many ways. Having to fend for yourself and not depend on your parents teaches you to become responsible, to take pride in having a place of your own {shared or otherwise}, and to prioritise things across all areas of your life. You will notice that you mature a lot faster compared to your friends who still live at home.
- You learn to save: While most parents probably wouldn’t say no to helping out with money, you do learn to save money thanks to having rent bills, electricity bills, phone bills, and groceries to buy. You most likely will start to learn to budget and stick to it.
- You become a cheap-skate: In a way, this is related to the above point. When you move out of home, you do look actively for bargains. Whether it’s a pair of shoes or choosing home-brand oats over a branded one for your breakfast, you learn how to count the pennies. That way, you can spend them on more enticing things. Like the cask of wine where you get 4 litres for a piddly sum. And honestly, if like me you moved out at an early age and as a poor student, the taste of the wine at that stage doesn’t really matter.
- You will look for a job. Any job: When I was a student, I worked at the uni library for 3 years and it paid quite well. Additionally, I worked as an admin assistant for a while, a student mentor and even a resident assistant while living on-campus. My library job though, would come to an end once I finished uni. And so, I started to actively look for jobs 6 months before I graduated. 35 applications later, and two months into my post uni life, I got a couple of interviews and found a job. Basically, knowing that you have bills to pay will make you way more persistent to find work. I know of friends who lived at home who were pretty laid back and eventually found jobs 6 to 8 months after our graduation.
- You become independent: After having parents do most things for you, living away from home teaches you independence like never before. You will learn to do your own laundry, learn to cook, learn to change light bulbs and even learn to fix a few things around the house. You will realise that you are capable of so much more than you ever thought!
I won’t deny that there were days, maybe months, when I was envious of friends who lived at home. They didn’t have to sacrifice much and were able to save a lot more while still being able to go out to dinners, movies and holidays. They didn’t have to scrimp and save for a deposit to get a mortgage as they lived at home. But in the end, I still wouldn’t trade it because it made me the person I am today. And it made me value my home, my efforts and everything else I buy, a whole lot more.
Have you ever lived out of home {not counting marriage}? What lessons did you learn that you could add to this list? Do share!
