Tuesday Tips: Developing A Crisis Plan

Today’s Tip: Develop A Mental Health Crisis Plan

About six years ago, I quit my job. It had been getting me down for a long time – the work was dull and repetitious, my colleagues were highly unpleasant and the atmosphere was toxic. So I handed in my resignation and four weeks later, I walked out of that building with a huge sense of relief.

Within 12 months, I had started up my first business. Like most Etsy stores, it started small and it started slowly. A few years after that, I opened a second store.

I quickly learnt that working from home and being self-employed had its challenges – the inability to separate work and home life, the loneliness (I often don’t speak to a single soul until my partner gets home from work at 6:30pm) and the monotony of lunches – no food court here! (Usually I just have toast….)

The hardest thing was dealing with peoples perceptions of what I did all day. The remarks about me being unemployed were untrue, the comments about how up-to-date I must be with daytime TV were offensive, the quips about being a “lady of leisure” were irritating and the insinuations that I sit on my backside doing nothing all day were really hurtful. Eventually it started to have an effect on my mental health.

By the end of last year I was flat-out running the two stores. It wasn’t only the actual work that was draining me mentally, it was this desperation to prove to those people who constantly put me down that I wasn’t lazy and that I really was working hard.

I began working so damn hard that I made myself sick. Literally. I started suffering anxiety and would routinely have panic attacks. In my head I had convinced myself that if I was successful, if I could prove to people that my stores were turning a large profit, if my marketing strategy was better, if I had more orders and more sales, then people would accept that this is what I do, this was my job. I could prove that I wasn’t useless or a waste of space.

When it got to the point of working 18 hours a day every day, my partner stepped in. We talked, I admitted that I felt like a failure because my business was only making a small profit and after many years of working on them, people still thought I sat around all day watching TV. I admitted to having (and hiding) panic attacks. We made a visit to my GP and the three of us agreed on a treatment plan for me which involved seeing a psychologist – I was diagnosed with generalised anxiety disorder and agoraphobia.

Things improved after a few months but recently the comments have started again. The insinuations that I watch daytime TV. The remarks about how much spare time I must have. The disbelief when I say I’m busy. And the more comments I get, the more it bothers me and the harder (and longer) I work. Since I returned from holiday three weeks ago, I’ve had zero days off work. I can already feel the anxieties starting up and I know I need to pull back again.

I’ve spoken to my partner and he knows that I’m struggling a little at the moment. We have agreed on a crisis plan – if my behaviour starts to dramatically change, if I start having panic attacks, if I stop going to bed at night because I’m working, then he is to book me an appointment with my GP and we’ll take things from there.

Talking to my partner and having a plan in place for if I slip into my anxiety disorder is like a security blanket – it’s there whether I need it or not, and simply knowing it’s there has already helped me.

Have you got a crisis plan? Do you think it would help to develop one? 

For anyone who has suffered any form of mental health problem, agreeing on a crisis plan with a partner, relative or close friend will be beneficial to long term management of your mental health. 

You can get more information about the NSW Mental Health Association’s Mental Health Month here.