People, Society, Travel, Work

Public Transport Etiquette

priority seating

Most people who live in large cities and commute to work in the CBD, would need to catch public transport. I work in the city and have to catch the bus to and from work each day.

Being a regular user of public transport, I’m familiar with the etiquette or polite ‘rules’ of travelling on the bus. School children and students are not supposed to be sitting when a full fee paying adult is standing, and there are four seats with a little sign saying that if you sit there, you have to move for pregnant women, elderly people or disabled people. 

A couple of weeks ago, Mr W and I were sitting in one of the priority seating spaces. I usually avoid them, because I absolutely loathe that awkwardness of “is she or isn’t she pregnant” when you see someone and are not sure whether you should offer your seat.

So I was staring out the window (I enjoy doing this of a morning on the bus) and wasn’t paying attention, when the woman in the seat in front of me said “Excuse me would you like this seat?” to someone who had just gotten on the bus and was standing. The bus was packed. Mr W was playing on his phone and hadn’t noticed anything. I slightly turned my head and saw that the standing person was indeed a girl I recognised from uni, and she was indeed pregnant. She said to the seat offer or “Yes please, I would like to sit, that would be good“. Immediately, I panicked and wanted to tap her on the shoulder and say: “I’m so sorry, I know I’m sitting in this seat but I was looking out the window and didn’t notice you, I would have moved, I’m not one of those people who won’t move for pregnant women!” I was sitting there thinking “OMG, did she have an edge of annoyance in her voice that was directed towards us for not moving? I’m not like that, I feel awful!“.

Quite possibly the bus in question!

I spent the rest of the bus trip beating myself up for not noticing this pregnant woman and hoping that she didn’t think that we were just rude and didn’t offer our seat to her. Whenever I’m sitting anywhere on the bus and I notice someone get on who is elderly or looks pregnant, I think about whether I should offer my seat. What if the woman isn’t pregnant and I offend her? What if the elderly person is offended I think they are old enough I will give up my seat?! Often, I’m staring out the window and I don’t notice the people getting on the bus. Will they think I’m some ridiculously rude Gen Y brat when I genuinely wasn’t paying attention? Usually, I’m not sitting in a “priority” seat, but I often feel too scared to offer anyway, even though it would be the right thing to do!

So what do you do? Would you offer your seat to someone who looks pregnant even if you aren’t sure? Have you ever offered your seat to someone who you thought was pregnant who actually wasn’t? Any public transport horror stories?

 

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    • http://www.strongerbraversmarter.wordpress.com Lucy Gilkison

      I usually sit at the very front seat, and if I notice someone get on the bus who looks pregnant or is even a little older than myself ill gove up my seat for them. My bus into the city is always packed and it drives me up the wall when there are people standing because a younger person wouldn’t give up their seat. I’ve (on more than one occasion) told kids to stand up so someone else can sit.

    • http://www.strongerbraversmarter.wordpress.com Lucy Gilkison

      And as I write my last comment, There’s 7 people who didn’t give up priority seating on my bus for someone with a pram!

    • Jess C

      Just last night I was getting on the train at Central in the middle of peak hour and was relieved to get a seat. My next thought was “but I’ll stand up if anyone around me geniuinely needs it”.. They didn’t, so I sat. Even though I am ‘only’ 23, I’m on an adult go card so my attitude on the train is that “I just stood on my feet at work for 8-9 hours, you probably sat on your butt all day” so I don’t feel guilty about taking a seat, but I always make sure I give it up for people who need it… while others studiously ignore the situation.

      • Whippersnapper

        Oh I remember when I was at uni, Jess, and I worked in retail. On my feet all day. I remember my first few shifts, my feet were in such agony, I filled two buckets when I got home – one with ice and cold water, the other with hot water and alternated soaking my feet between the two!! It was so much hard work, no wonder I was so slim!

        I remember getting on the bus on the way home on the rare occasions I travelled in peak hour (and thank goodness for retail hours being often outside of peak hour) and thinking “I bet most of you have been sitting in an office all day and I’ve been on my feet, it is so unfair I have to stand for you because I’ve got a student pass!”

        • Jess C

          Haha, I was a bit like that too during my undergrad. And I’ve had to learn the hard way that sometimes you go for comfort over the stylish shoes. In the end though there’s worse things in life than having to *gasp* stand up on public transport. Now that I’m full time in retail and doing a Masters part time so not entitled to concession, I do enjoy the freedom of the blue go card. :)

    • http://tamsinhowse.com/blog Tamsin Howse

      When I was in high school, we all sat across the priority train seating, but we ALL jumped up as soon as anyone was standing, and said “Would you like a seat, sir?” as we were instructed to do, in no uncertain terms (and you could get detentions if you didn’t).

      What’s up with teenagers these days? Just this morning I had one sitting on the bus in the priority seat, with heaps of spare seats behind, who didn’t move when a man got on who obviously had his movement impaired AND was eldery! MOVE!! He had to hobble down to the next seat.

    • Valentina B

      I don’t offer anymore. It makes me feel terrible but I’ve been told off too many times for being ‘rude’ and ‘assuming.’ If I’m in priority seating I won’t offer unless it is super obvious and i figure that people can ask.

      I’ve had to ask numerous times and most people generally don’t actually notice that there is someone else who needs it.

      I know personally I’m usually reading a book so I don’t notice much around me on the train.

    • carohutchison

      When I was pregnant (with twins) I would catch the tram to work. I must admit I had a feeling of entitlement in getting the priority seat and 99% of the time it was offered to me. On one occasion though, I was already seated, and a man got on the tram and told me to move, quite rudely I thought. It turned out that he was vision impaired and clearly had the same sense of entitlement that I did! Once I stood up and he realised that I was pregnant he was quite apologetic. It was a good reminder that even within the priority seating, there is still a hierarchy.

      Sometimes when going home all I wanted to do was stand and un-numb my bum, and it was always the men who felt uncomfortable keeping a seat when I declined.

    • Frank

      I also avoid sitting in those seats. But, if I am sitting there, most of the time I won’t verbally offer my seat – i’ll just get up and move down the bus/train. They can decide if they want to take the seat or not. It avoids conversations like this. If I want to read, I try to avoid the priority seats.