But, How Did She Do It?

Family-Exercising-header

Today’s guest post by Karen:

I’ll say it quick because it kind of makes me wince: I’velost22kilosinthelastsixmonths.

As it turns out, it’s hard to hide a 22kg weight loss when you’re only 159cm tall so I’ve had quite a few comments (all lovely) and more than a couple of questions.

Actually, it’s been just one question… “How did you do it?!”

And I’ll get to that, eventually.

But first I want to tell you about Jane.  Jane is a figment of my imagination.  But let’s pretend she’s a smart and lovely woman in her thirties with a few adorable kids and a gorgeous hubby.  Oh, and she’s drowning in debt.  Ugly debt that’s piling up no matter what she does.  It’s making her anxious about the future and it stops her from enjoying normal stuff like taking the kids out on weekends or getting her hair cut.  She’s started to feel ashamed at her lack of control and wonders how she ended up like this.  So she has decided to tackle it head on.  Go Jane!

Someone in her office told her that if you stop buying clothes your debt disappears.  So she did it!  And it worked!  Well, okay, that’s a load of rubbish.  It worked for a month or two but then the seasons changed and the kids grew and she got invited to a wedding and before you knew it, she was buying clothes again (who knew?!) and the debt continued to mount.

Then she heard about this other plan where you don’t spend any money at all for an entire week, and you do this every couple of months or so.  And another where you only barter for goods and services until midday every day, at which time you switch back to cash.  Or better yet, she was told about companies who (for a small fee) completely take over your bank account and pay your bills until you’re back in the black. After that you’re on your own, baby.

These people are freakin’ geniuses!

Moving doesn't have to be boring

Just think for a minute about the discomfort Jane has been spared.  Living within your means, sticking to a budget, resisting impulse buys and reading the fine print on financial commitments is just so damn boring!  Isn’t life there to be enjoyed?

But who is the genius now?  Living in the moment and ‘enjoying life’ had left me more than 30kg overweight with no real idea of how to fix it.  So I got some help.  And unlike Jane’s help, the advice given to me was as simple as dirt.  I needed to get real, grow up, and stop living like a petulant teenager who can’t get her own way.  I love that old nugget from Thomas Jefferson: “I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.”

So how did I lose the weight?  I ate less and moved more.  Shocking, I know.

Self-control is a difficult concept to nail down in a world where our every whim can be gratified at the swipe of a screen.  We congratulate ourselves on learning, experiencing, having or discovering more and better things faster than our friends can manage.  And we’re told that we’re worth it.

Really?

Well I’m out.  At the age of 37 I’ve finally decided to live within my nutritional means because I want to be around for a very long time.  My grandchildren’s Nana won’t be the slimmest or the prettiest one at the playground.  She won’t have the coolest blue rinse or the flashest electric scooter.  But she’ll be there.  And she’ll be playing hard.

Bring it, kids.

Additional  Author’s Note: Just like you can’t tell if that person with the designer wardrobe is a great budgeter or if she has debt collectors around every fortnight, you can’t tell how healthy a person is by how they look.

And just like you can’t tell if that guys Porsche is the fruit of a huge income, or if it was a gift, or if he stole it, or if he will eat baked beans at every meal for five years to pay for it… likewise you can’t tell what someone’s nutritional needs and metabolism are all about by looking at them.

I believe that for most people, weight control is about energy in versus energy out – just like for most people, financial control is about living within your means. But there will always be exceptions and exemptions and, just like our social security net is there to help people live with financial dignity, it’s up to us to afford the same dignity to everyone regardless of their appearance.

What do you do to keep in your optimal health? Have you mastered self control? Have you tried a fad or a diet, only to find it didn’t work?

Note: Karen is writing about her own personal situation, not the situation of others. Any offensive comments will be removed.

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    • Claire Wallace

      That’s fantastic Karen! Thanks for sharing. I think the financial analogy is a really good one. Have you had to completely replace your wardrobe since losing weight?

      I try to think about my overall health rather than my weight. And by treating my body well and eating right, my appetite looks after itself and I don’t crave junk food (except when PMSing – that’s a different story!)

      • Claire Wallace

        Edit: I meant to say – Speaking of finances, have you had to completely replace your wardrobe since losing weight?

      • Karen

        Thanks Claire!

        And YES I completely ran out of clothes! The sudden onset of winter was a rude shock – nothing at all fit me (I dropped two sizes) so I had to start from scratch. The shopping was a little bit of fun though :)

    • http://music.johnanthonyjames.com/ John James

      There’s been a bunch of really interesting articles in the scientific media recently about the “science” of weight-loss. Stuff like:

      – your metabolism slows when you lose weight, that’s why you can plateau when you reduce your calorie intake…you don’t just keep losing weight because you eat less…because your body uses less energy, it burns less fats…

      – paradoxically, the heavier you are, the easier it becomes to add more weight if you over-indulge…

      – it takes three years for a change in diet to achieve full results – three years – that’s a lot of discipline, and a long time to wait for the pay-off…

      – people who have weight-loss surgery have also been shown to have changes in their brains…it’s just not the surgery that makes people eat less, but something about the surgery also rewires the brain and reduces the cravings for fatty foods…they’re not sure yet why this happens, but it’s interesting how much brain-chemistry is involved in weight-loss

      I guess what I’m saying is that it’s different for everyone. I’m not slim, but I’m happy with my weight…I don’t try to watch what I eat, but I do stick to a routine:

      – 3 meals a day
      – I don’t eat after 5pm
      – I avoid processed food

      That’s about it really…it works for me, it probably won’t work for everyone…but, like Karen says, it does require discipline…

    • http://www.kellyexeter.com.au Kelly Exeter

      You see, this is why you need a blog … I want more of this!!

      Great post Karen!!!

      • Karen

        Haha thanks Kelly! A girls gotta love a cheer squad 😉

    • Whippersnapper

      I’m going to have to go against the grain here, and say I disagree with the notion that weight loss and health are all about self control. If it were that simple for everyone, everyone would be slim, because no-one wants to be fat, as we as a society treat being fat as a terrible thing to be! While I think it is great that you have taken control of your health, Karen, I believe it should be just about that – health and not weight.

      If you were unhealthy prior to your weight loss and are healthy now, then that is fantastic.

      But, health is not a one size fits all approach. I’m sure there are plenty of people who are overweight who move a lot and eat a diet of primarily fresh fruit, veges, meat with very limited processed foods. Likewise, there are many people who are naturally slim, and eat a very processed diet and don’t exercise. They need a kick up the bum about health more so than someone who is overweight who eats a moderate diet.

      I’m constantly met with disbelief, that I, a non-fat person, could actually think like that. I’m not sure why that is. My mother, for one, was shocked when I told her that you can’t judge someone’s health just by looking at their size.

      I know myself, the skinniest I have been, is when I have been least healthy – eating next to nothing because I was depressed after a break up. Doctor did my BMI at a general check up and said I was fine. No questions about what I was eating or exercising, yet I wasn’t eating healthily (because I basically wasn’t eating) and wasn’t exercising other than incidentals like walking to uni. I eat a much less processed diet than I did back then and I am getting back into exercise regularly (after 2 months off, eek), but I’m a bit heavier. I’d like to think I’m much healthier now than then.

      • http://music.johnanthonyjames.com/ John James

        Yep – I’ve never felt “healthy” anytime when my BMI was low…in fact, probably the opposite…but there have also been times when I’ve felt fat and unhealthy too…what I’ve discovered is that happy medium of not dieting, but not being over-weight…I think it’s all about learning to understand how your body works…listening to it…and adjusting your natural diet to one that works for you…I’m happy to carry a little bit of weight, but not so much that I feel heavy and unfit…when I start feeling heavy, I adjust what I’m eating, but I don’t stop eating…

        • Whippersnapper

          Yeah – I am the same. When I was in America, I was so focused on seeking out the healthiest possible food because their food was awful. Especially, I wanted to avoid high fructose corn syrup. I also had many dates with the toilet while there, because even their unprocessed food wasn’t as good a quality as Australian food, so, err, it was passing right through me. Also, we were walking A LOT as you do when you travel.

          I came back to Australia and I had lost weight but I felt awful because the food had made me so ill. Started eating Australian food again, started feeling good again, and then stared eating a sneaky little Freddo with my mid morning coffee and BAM, I started feeling SHIT. So I stopped and I’m feeling better now.

      • Karen

        Thanks for your comment, and you’ve raised a very interesting point. And as a matter of fact, my original draft of this article included much of the same sentiments. I edited it down before I submitted it because it was way too long, but it went something like this…

        Just like you can’t tell if that person with the designer wardrobe is a great budgeter or if she has debt collectors around every fortnight, you can’t tell how healthy a person is by how they look.

        And just like you can’t tell if that guys Porsche is the fruit of a huge income, or if it was a gift, or if he stole it, or if he will eat baked beans at every meal for five years to pay for it… likewise you can’t tell what someone’s nutritional needs and metabolism are all about by looking at them.

        I believe that for *most* people, weight control is about energy in versus energy out – just like for *most* people, financial control is about living within your means. But there will always be exceptions and exemptions and, just like our social security net is there to help people live with financial dignity, it’s up to us to afford the same dignity to everyone regardless of their appearance.

        I hope that clears it up for you a bit? I certainly wasn’t implying a one-size-fits all solution, but it was a lesson that I needed to learn and I felt compelled to share.

        • Whippersnapper

          Absolutley Karen, I totally get that your article was about the experience for you. My comment was more supposed to be that we have this generalised view of a ‘one size fits all’ approach to health and weight loss in our society.

          I think there is a lot of attention at the moment on food, weight, health in the scientific community. I think a lot of our age old mentalities on food/health/weight are on the way out. I definitely think there is starting to be a big shift away from “low fat” foods being really good for you (low fat flavoured fruit yoghurt, for example) and the focus is shifting towards refined carbs and sugar as the culprit of bad health related food (which in some people also relates to weight).

          I’m a firm believer in your health being about the *type* of calories you eat as opposed to how many calories you eat. I know it would be extremely hard for me to eat 5 oranges and not feel really ill – but I could probably down a half loaf of bread before I started feeling unhealthily full!

        • http://tamsinhowse.com/blog Tamsin Howse

          I would like to put that in the article if you’re happy for me to.

          • Karen

            Sure thing, boss!

    • Monique Fischle

      Great post Karen!

      While I agree with Whipper to a certain extent, I do believe that for the majority of people, your approach is the right approach to weight loss. Again, it’s not always the case.

      I’ve lost 8kgs in the last 6 months, due in large part to the fact that I am not an emotional eater. In fact, when upset or stressed, my appetite all but disappears. Instead of snacking a million times a day and eating large portion sizes, I cut back (almost eliminating snacks) and ate smaller portions of healthier food.

      This isn’t a one-size-fits-all thing, but that is what worked for me and I actually feel healthier.

      I hope you post more often!

      • http://music.johnanthonyjames.com/ John James

        I think it’s like this…not everyone can be “skinny” and be healthy, but everyone needs to be disciplined when it comes to what they eat – regardless of whether you are naturally slim, plump, thick-set or big boned or whatever – simply to be healthy. But healthy does not equal a specific weight or body-type.

        • Monique Fischle

          Definitely agree with you on that one.

      • Karen

        Thanks Monique!

        It’s funny you mention emotional eating. I lost the weight by carefully watching my calorie intake. At first (about 2-3 weeks) it was all about discipline and feeling mentally strong. But after then, I’d occasionally get really peckish and because of the previous work I’d done, I could (for the first time in my life) identify that I wasn’t actually hungry! I realised that I was bored, or tired, or sad, or jubilant… or whatever!

        The discipline at first was just that: discipline. But after a while it helped me to be intuitive, to enjoy my food more, and to treat problems appropriately. Funnily enough I’m less stressed and less bored than I used to be too 😉

        • Monique Fischle

          I put on weight at uni (when I lived on campus) because I’m a major bored eater. If food is there and I’m not doing anything, I’m going to eat it. I had to be really disciplined about what I would buy because I knew if I bought junk food, I’d just eat it.

          It really is about discipline! And congrats on staying so disciplined!!!

        • http://girl--world.blogspot.com/ Katherine

          Excellent article.

          This has been key for me, too – recognising that sometimes when I feel like eating it’s because I am bored or happy or being sociable or when or tired or irritated or just flapping around the house looking for something to do and hey! snacks! For me, eating only because I’m hungry sounds very simple but takes an awful lot of mental work.

    • Melissa Savage

      Congratulations on you weight loss so far Karen, you’ve worked hard and it has paid off.

      I lost a bit of weight (8kgs, not a huge amount I know, but I was only a size 12 creeping up on a 14 to begin with) a few years ago on weight watchers, and I was all gung ho for about the first 6 months and convinced that weight loss was easy and really only required some good old fashioned self-control. But then I just sort of got back to living my life and as it tends to be, I crept back into my old habits. The weight stayed off for a couple of years but it crept back around the three year mark and now I’m back almost to where I started (this time with a wedding looming aaaaaaah!!). I would really like to hear from someone who lost a chunk of weight and has kept it off for 10 years or more, because as far as I can tell, keeping the weight off involves invoking Mad Eye Moody and practising CONSTANT VIGILANCE every minute for the rest of my life.

      • Karen

        Haha great point Mel! I’ll … errr … get back to you in 10 years?!

        You’re right though. I’ve made a decision that this wasn’t a weight loss plan. This was my new normal and that I have to keep the end in sight, hence the Nana reference at the end of my piece!

        • Melissa Savage

          New normal, that’s an excellent way of thinking about it! I’m currently looking at switching my diet around based on Palaeo principles: minimal processed food, no grains. The days I have done this successfully I feel better than the days where I eat nutella (like, er, today). Thanks Karen :)

      • Whippersnapper

        I think that’s the problem with the weight loss industry – 98% of “diets” fail and people are back to their original weight within 5 years.

        Mr W’s mother is on weight watchers again, after she went from a size 16-18 (before we dated so probaly 6-7 years ago) to about my size(12, but sometimes 14 bottom) on weight watchers a few years back. She then regained it all within 3 years and is now trying to lose it again on weight watchers.

        That is why the focus needs to switch to a matter of health – eating food and exercising to fuel your body in the best way possible, rather than losing weight.

        • Melissa Savage

          Yup. I went on weight watchers with my (then) housemate Laurin, who lost I think 15-18kgs but has gained it all back with interest in that same magical 3 year time frame. Sustained weight loss is a bit of a mythical creature given a normal western lifestyle.

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