Zombie Defense Station

Do you have a zombie evacuation plan?

As Husband & I arrived at the shopping centre carpark on Sunday morning, just a bit before 9am, we noticed no other cars around. This is unusual as there’s a 24 hour Kmart as well as a few supermarkets that are open from 8am. We were unsettled by this development and I suggested perhaps the Zombie Apocalypse had happened and we just hadn’t realised.

Immediately the two of us sized up what we had on us and what we were wearing, with me declaring I was glad I was wearing my loafers as ballet flats can be quite hard to run in, but I wished I’d brought my jacket as it is warm for nights as well as being black, making me harder to see. Husband looked around and declared the shopping centre would make a good base of operation as it’s fairly easily defendable and we would have plenty of supplies. We then walked towards the cafe, continuing this train of thought, and both got a fright as we saw a woman shuffling along in a very zombie-like state. We were relieved when she yawned and stopped for coffee.

This whole episode got me thinking about the zombie apocalypse on how for many, including Husband & I, it’s a matter of not if, but when. We have therefore put together a few alternative ZEPs (Zombie Evacuation Plans) and have communicated these with our friends, all of whom are also well versed in Zombie defence strategies.

For example you don’t really want a gun – ammo is heavy to carry and can run out – where as a machete will serve you well, especially if you know how to swing it. We were also very disappointed when my brother moved interstate as he had a ute, and a machete, and we knew he’d be really good on our side. Plus he was more than happy to discuss strategy with us without thinking we were a little bit mental.

You can actually buy pre-made zombie apocalypse defence kits, which I’ll admit made me laugh a little bit, but it’s good to know. Although I’m assuming, should the zombie apocalypse actually happen, their shipping might be a little delayed.

T.

Do you have a Zombie Evacuation Plan? Or do you think we’ve seen far too many horror movies? Do you think you’d survive? 

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