Surviving The Walk of Shame

August 9, 2012 in Body, Celebrity, Dating, Entertainment, Face, Fashion, Hair, Lifestyle, People, Relationships, Self, Sex, Society, Stories, Style

Look familiar?

Have you ever done a walk of shame? You know how it goes – you go out of a night, go home with someone you hadn’t planned and have to return home in your clothes from the night before, often with hair all out of sorts and eye makeup looking a little more Kiss than kissable.

It probably won’t surprise you to learn I’ve never really done a walk of shame. Closest I ever came was when Husband & I had gone out to the movies, before we were actually together, and we went back to his place that evening. Before you know it I’m falling asleep so I stayed the night and had to be driven home by Husband the next morning, back to my parent’s place, to get changed and ready for church! How’s that for awkward! Luckily Husband played it totally cool and spent the time while I was getting ready having coffee with my parents. I actually think that calm first morning was the foundation for their entire relationship.

But my stories aside, I’ve always been acutely aware of the walk of shame. You can’t show up at a cafe at 8am every Sunday morning and not catch sight of a few. It’s the stilettos and mini skirts that give it away. So from my keen observations I’ve put together my own tips for surviving the walk of shame in style.

Kim K leaving Kanye’s house

The first part of this is preparation. Packing your essentials before you head out. And I know there’s only so much room in your tiny handbag so I’ll keep it brief.

Pack:

Bobby pins and a hair tie
Baby wipes (there are really tiny packs of these)
Mints
Sunglasses
Lip balm
A long necklace
Flats
T-shirt (if you can fit it – roll it up)

So the next morning, here’s what you do:

1. Fix your hair!
Use the bobby pins and hair tie to pull your hair up. If you curled it the night before use the mess & volume to pull it into either a twisted pony or the style I like to call “roses” (I wrote instructions on Fox In Flats here) or if your hair was straight pull it into a ponytail – sorted!

2. Clear your skin!
Nothing gives away a big night like raccoon eyes or a bright red smear of lippy. Use your baby wipes (remember the tiny handbag sized packet?) to remove all traces of last night’s makeup. Use the lip balm to get your lippy off – it’ll be much easier.

3. Cover up!
If you managed to fit in a t-shirt (well done you!) throw this over your outfit from the night before to dress it down.

4. Accessorise!
Throw on a long necklace and those sunglasses to instantly pull together your look and appear just like you’d planned than sequin mini skirt all along.

5. Hide your shoes!
Nothing screams WALK OF SHAME like stilettos in your hand. What house doesn’t have a shopping bag floating around you can nick? Yoink and hide your shoes in rather than carrying them home in your hand. There are great fold up flats available these days or pack a pair of thongs. Also very helpful for 2am when your feet HURT.

6. Freshen up!
Shower if you can. If not, use those baby wipes to freshen yourself up and have a mint to banish morning after breath.

And the biggest tip:

7. Hold your head high!
Nothing says shame like staring at the pavement. Hold that head high and OWN IT. You just got laid. Well done you!

And, don’t forget, stay safe! If it’s not on, it’s not on, people!

Have you survived the walk of shame? What are your tips?

Image 1 Image 2

Author Info

Tamsin Howse has written 180 posts.
Tamsin is a wife, stepmother and blogger with a passion for people and relationships, fashion and beauty, and an inability to successfully complete household tasks. Co-founder and Editor-in-chief of KiKi & Tea.
Follow on twitter: @TamsinHowse
Website: http://kikiandtea.com

12 Comments »

← The Last Slice: Old Friends

Overseas Weddings: Fad Or Fun? →

Ash

You forgot to counter in one thing:

“OH NO, I have to get out of here before they wake up…”
- http://tamsinhowse.com/blog Tamsin Howse
  
  And gnaw your arm off to escape? Hehehe.
Whippersnapper

Having done and had many friends do the walk of shame, I can assure you that nobody thinks about any of those things or packing anything in their bag other than ID, cash and house keys prior to a night out! Besides, most of the time, no one goes out thinking that they are going to be picking someone up that night and go home with them.
- http://tamsinhowse.com/blog Tamsin Howse
  
  And then there’s a flip side of people like me who have precisely 0.05% chance of encountering the walk of shame (being married and all) and yet you’ll find all those things (bar the t-shirt) in my handbag on a night out.
  
  Swings and roundabouts, eh?
- Melissa Savage
  
  And there are those of us who have Bridget Jones style superstition: if I do prepare to meet someone I won’t get anywhere but if I don’t prepare (ie, granny undies) then I’ll end up findin the love of my life.
aleced

Melissa Savage, you took the words right out of my mouth. If one was to prepare in such a way, you are pretty much guaranteeing that you will not pick up. Murphy’s Law is it?
Takes all the fun out of one night stands and the walk of awesomeness if you are ask me :p (I can safely say this, knowing my one night stands are back in my backpacker and working on a tropical island days)
- Whippersnapper
  
  Having had a think about this, and having gone out partying a lot as a 18-21 year old, carrying a clutch the size of a tissue, the only packing advice I would have for someone who may or may not pick up on a night clubbing or partying:
  
  1. Charged mobile phone
  2. Cash
  3. Pinned ATM card (with money in the account just in case)
  4. ID (preferably an 18+ card instead of a drivers licence or passport)
  5. Condoms.
  
  I agree too, Alece, it should be renamed the walk of awesomeness. There is no shame in enjoying an evening with a bloke! Mind you, I don’t really take offence to the term “walk of shame” because it’s just a joke. MIND YOU, I DO think that the phrase attaches shame to women only, as men don’t usually wear high heels, make up and glittery dresses on a night out. So men are not easily identified as being on a “walk of shame”, meaning that the indicators of it and our perception of the walk of shame – being panda eyes, high heels in hand and your glittery dress from the night before are all female oriented, meaning the “shame” attaches to women, which is not on.
  
  My preference if you’re going to enjoy said adventures is that you go back to your own home so you’re in your own territory, but sometimes, that doesn’t happen. As long as you are safe (in every sense of the word), have enough money and a charged mobile phone in case you need help, you’re as right as rain.
  - Melissa Savage
    
    Can I just say how delightful it has been to watch your journey into serious feminism, whipper. Warms my cockles.
Rose Russo

I’ve done the walk of shame too many times… I just bolt these days before the sun comes up. If the sun is already up, I’m screwed.

haha T you made me laugh at “You just got laid. Well done you!”
Valentina B

A friend told me that she stayed the night at a boy’s place and he clearly knew the pain of a walk of shame as he had in his bathroom make up removers, female deodorant, disposable toothbrushes and a towel with a “feel free to have a shower” note on it.

It struck me as weird at first but hey, it’s a nice gesture I’m sure! She certainly appreciated it.
melinka

If I can have a girly moment for err.. a moment.. I loved the Fox in Flats link! I have NO IDEA what to do with my hair, ever, and once I figure out how to put the bobby pins in an X, I’m set. Thanks!!
- http://tamsinhowse.com/blog Tamsin Howse
  
  Oh it’s easy! Insert the first one into your hair at a 45* angle, then put the second one over it, coming from the opposite direction, so it’s going over the first one (both on top of and underneath the first one), securing the first pin in place.
  
  OK, that wasn’t a very clear explanation, tell me if you don’t understand .

KiKi & Tea